Metal Men vs Colossus Episode Transcript

Transcription of our Metal Men vs Colossus episode.

Listen to our Metal Men vs Colossus episode here!

hey marvellous Joe here you guys like comics right how about winning the original Marvel vs. DC Comics series from the 90s well Jonathan and I were able to collect all four issues in mint condition bagged and boarded and we want to gift them to one lucky listener out there getting your name on our drawing is easy all you have to do is share a link to your favorite episode of this podcast and tag us in the post or story super simple you can do this on Instagram Twitter or Facebook again share your favorite episode tag us and you’re on your way to winning some free comics once we see your post we’ll add your name to the Hat and draw the winner on Thanksgiving Day 2019 you have until then to post looking forward to seeing what your favorite episodes of this podcast are on with the show [Music] [Music] hi welcome to the dynamic tool podcast a weekly show where we review superhero films and debate the superiority between Marvel and DC by comparing their characters in stat based battle simulations I’m Johnny DC and I’m his twin brother marvelous Joe and we’re back with another dual episode this time we’re pitting the metal men against Colossus and I should clarify it’s just gonna be one of the Metal Men not all of them although I’m pretty sure classes could take them all on oh you think yeah we’ll see repeating these guys against each other because Colossus will be a part of our Titans vs x-men episode that is coming up in just two weeks yeah it’s coming up really soon it’s gonna be a whole lot of fun I want sweet sweet revenge ever since our Justice League vs Avengers duel episode can’t wait for it before we get into the duel we will be breaking down the comic book movie news items from the past week including all of the news that came out of the HBO max presentation yeah there was a lot there oh yeah oh yeah I can’t wait to talk about it we’ll also be talking about some new Marvel film release dates including Cat Man 3 and the spider-man into the spider-verse sequel as always you can go ahead and check out our segment times in our episode description if you want to skip ahead to a particular topic feel free to do that we want to give a quick shout out to all the people who have rated us on Apple podcasts and iTunes we’re up to  of 200 ratings on iTunes already two away yeah big shout out to Marvel is better sorry Johnny the fuck kind of thing is that it’s the greatest iTunes hand I haven’t seen it yet but also thank you to Kayla oh and Neil 30 69 28 and also door dulu for leaving ghosts reviews on Apple podcasts as you guys know we’re trying to get to 200 because at that point Rotten Tomatoes says we’re eligible to have our reviews count towards those films official tomato meters on that website so it’s a huge goal of ours if you guys can help us out by either giving us a rating on iTunes if you haven’t already or by sharing the show with your friends and family super appreciated can’t thank you guys enough but now that that’s done onto the news no quick to the no fries so no prizes an award that Marvel East to give out up until the 90s to fans our version the dynamic dual no prize is a digital award that we post on social media that I personally draw for those who we feel gave the best answer to our question of the week last week’s question was out of the canceled and potentially canceled Marvel television shows which one will you miss the most was in regards to all of the Marvel television show cancellations that are being brought about due to the rise of the Disney Plus platform we got quite a few great answers here first honorable mention goes to son of Fargo Monde who said that he will miss daredevil the most because he was a big fan of Charlie Cox and he wanted to get another season to see if Elektra had survived the end of the defenders show oh crap I totally forgot about that cliffhanger yeah no Ryan Reynolds also gave the answer of daredevil and included the Punisher as well yeah those are both great fantastic shows gonna miss him it’s hard to think that as excited as I am for the Disney Plus series to come out the cost of Disney having their own streaming platform was these great Netflix shows yeah like are we ever gonna see Jon Bernthal as The Punisher again he was perfect I hope so I hope so honorable mention goes to Dustin Balcom who said that he misses the Punisher because Jon Bernthal was perfect and he played a great tortured Frank Castle Joel Seagrave gets honorable mention for his answer of daredevil and the Punisher and since I get theme yeah there are both good that both ended on high notes Jimmy would chick said that he misses the defenders the most because all the shows were connected no matter how good or bad they were they were all built up together and he liked that shared television universe Kenneth Emeka nice jr. he said that he would miss jessica jones the most because he said that it surpassed the comic book world and dealt with PTSD abuse and it was a show that revealed that not all superheroes wear tights finally stating that it gave a voice to the voiceless all great points I was a huge fan of the Jessica Jones show and yet he’s right it touched on issues that a whole lot of other superhero media never even come close to finally Carmen Rodriguez gets honorable mention for her answer of agent Carter she said she will forever be upset that that show got canceled right and that was another case I think of a show that gave voice to the voiceless you know it was all about women empowerment just like Jessica Jones was although agent Carter was a lot more lighthearted and fun and Hayley Atwell was just fantastic in that role I can’t wait to see her what if episode coming up in a couple of years but the winner of this week’s no prize goes to Jeff miles jr. for his answer of cloak and dagger now that was a show that was a direct casualty of Marvel’s changing of the guard in their executive lineup yeah this was a result of Kevin Feige being named as chief creative officer as opposed to just Disney Plus trying to compete with Netflix right and Jeff said that he was a fan of the show because of the great chemistry between the two leads those kids had amazing chemistry and the show dealt with social issues such as police brutality and women empowerment and poverty it was just an amazing show that was perfect for this time and a great adaptation of those characters if you guys have a listen to our dual episode where we pit cloak and dagger against the Wonder Twins check that episode out because we had a lot of fun with that one yeah so congrats to Jeff miles jr. actually I learned that Jeff is a professional artist a professional painter and you can check out his work on the miles collective comm he’s currently working on an Obama Batman which I imagine is kind of like the Obama hope poster but with Batman oh I think that’s the case that’s cool or might just be Obama wearing the cowl so again visit the miles collective comm to check out his art and congrats again Jeff for winning the no prize if you’ve the listener want to win your own dynamic duel no prize go ahead and stay tuned to later on this episode when we will be asking another question of the week with that out of the way I’d seen the news yeah look you got it right that time yay [Music] okay so HBO max had a huge presentation this past week of which they released a ton of information regarding their DC content starting with the fact that they are launching with every single DC film including the new Joker film that’s a lot I don’t even think the DC Universe app does that no they don’t there’s a lot of films that haven’t made it on to DC Universe yet including the big ones like Batman V Superman Wonder Woman Aquaman Justice League really yeah they’re still not on that platform Wow what a ripoff so it seems like part of the news regarding HBO Mac’s is that people who are currently subscribed to HBO now will have their subscription rolled over into HBO Macs and you get like quadruple the content for the same price point which is $14.99 a month exactly that’s a huge it is huge I thought we were gonna get charged more for HBO Mac’s than for HBO now but it turns out you’re right HBO now is just folding under HBO max so if you’re currently subscribed to HBO now Congrats you’ll be getting the new HBO max content when it releases in spring of 2020 now the big question is what’s gonna happen to the DC Universe subscribers because it seems like that platform is going to go away that’s what the rumor is what’s just a rumor for now DC Universe actually sent out their own sort of letter to all of its subscribers sank hey we’re super excited by what HBO max revealed today we’re still here we’re still producing content we’re just getting started so I think what DC should do is offer their HBO max content at that price point and have all DC video content there but roll over their comic stuff into a separate subscription into kind of like what Marvel unlimited does and how much is that that’s like 5 yeah it’s like 70 bucks a year so around the same price as DC Universe right now a little bit cheaper right exactly so for 5 bucks a month you get access to all DC’s digital comics and for $14.99 a month you get access to HBO max so the one thing you get with DC Universe that as far as we know won’t be an HBO max is all of their like animated content and their social hub does anyone even use the social hub I guess they just read I don’t know I honestly have not used it that much yet okay now it’s said that HBO max will be releasing eight to ten exclusive feature films a year just to that platform and some of that content is gonna be DC feature films which are supposedly going to be produced by Greg Berlanti and JJ Abrams wow that’s a good duo there Greg Berlanti is the guy that produces the arrowverse shows right and JJ Abrams of course is the master of the reboot is it gonna be a reboot we don’t know yet I think honestly it’s probably up to him whether or not he wants to you a straight reboot or continue on with the current actors well I hope he keeps gal gadot on and Jason Momoa and Zachary Levi right yeah they were all great now greg berlanti will also be producing a green lantern series for HBO max and a strange adventures anthology series which is said to touch on a bunch of different characters and settings within the DC Universe that’s amazing I don’t care about strange adventures I’m really excited about Green Lantern though I’m excited for both yeah of course Greg Berlanti was one of the writers on the Green Lantern film that starred Ryan Reynolds mhm but their initial script was apparently very different from the final product it was apparently really really good so despite his history with Green Lantern in live-action I’m still really excited for that show interesting wouldn’t it be weird if Warner Brothers abandons the DC EU and just makes the current CW air over shows like the mainstream DC continuity because if the Green Lantern series is produced by Greg Berlanti it’s possible that it’s in the arrowverse and then you just have all the characters that you need within the television shows build on that continuity that you already have going so well especially with the upcoming crisis on Infinite Earths crossover well I was just about to say the beautiful thing about that crossover is that Warner Brothers can kind of have their cake and eat it too because you could say that everything is just a part of their multiverse now yeah yeah but will they reduce it down to one reality at the end of that show interesting question probably not because some CW shows will still be continuing and they’re launching new ones they announced recently that they’re developing a Superman and Lois Lane television series oh I heard that yeah for next season that’s pretty cool they should call that one Lois and Clark the newer Adventures of Superman there you go they’re also developing a new show called Green Arrow and the Canaries really yeah Green Arrow is gonna be a woman I think it’s Oliver Queen’s daughter from the future what and the two women who played Black Canary in the past are gonna be like her teammates interesting regarding the Green Lantern show is it going to star Hal Jordan or is it gonna be like set out in space with the Green Lantern Corps we don’t actually know yet I hope it’s set in the DC EU and it’s just about the core and then that way they don’t need to set up all that stuff when they create a hell Jordan base Green Lantern movie for theatres that would be cool just kind of have the series like lead up to the film yeah yeah although it’s rumored that Kyle Rayner will be the star of the show that’s just a rumor for now in other interesting news Elizabeth Banks will be producing a half-hour sitcom for HBO max called DC superhero high that’s supposed to focus around DC superheroes while they’re still in high school what the hell is that I’m pretty sure it’s inspired by DC superhero girls really yeah I’d rather have powerless back I had a better premise than this I’m not thrilled by this news we’ll see how it goes you’re not the target demographic no I definitely not yeah do patrol season two will be released on HBO max concurrently with its release on the DC Universe which makes sense because do patrol is sort of like the darling television show of DC Universe it’s the most successful critically acclaimed show on that platform more than Titans yes yeah okay so these shows are gonna be released weekly or are they gonna be bendable they will not be Benja boleyn fortunately it’s gonna be a weekly release schedule damn it just like Disney Plus so we won’t be reviewing them well I wonder now if Disney Plus is going to be releasing their shows weekly and HBO max is going to be releasing their DC shows weekly should we change the format of this show to start including those shows released on those platforms that feels like a lot of television watching but we could always stream it like all at once once the season wraps and talked about it then yeah I think that might be something we should start doing now honestly I second that motion what’s the shows on those platforms drop will start reviewing them okay at the end of their run yeah finally I could get you to watch some DC TV well I just really wanted to review the new Marvel shows so that’s why I’m saying that that kind of wraps up all of the DC related news for HBO max but I’m looking forward to I can’t wait for spring 2020 I’m definitely getting HBO max definitely canceling my Netflix subscription because this is just way too much money yeah I think I’ll be pretty happy with HBO max not only because of the DC content but because of all the other shows and content that they’ll have yeah it seems like a pretty damn good deal great competitor to Disney Plus for sure this brings us to our question of the week name a new DC television series that you hope gets developed for HBO max post your answer to our Instagram Twitter Facebook or email us at dynamic dual podcast at gmail.com we’ll pick our favorite answer and draw the a person a dynamic duel no prize that will post to social media in other news we learned this past week that Ant Man 3 has been greenlit and that Peyton Reed will be returning to direct that movie as well Paul Rudd and Michael Douglas yeah I’m assuming that Evangeline Lilly will be back to return as well since everybody else’s and they’re probably contracted I’m super excited about this news as you guys know Ant Man and the wasp wasn’t my favorite MCU film I think they missed a lot of opportunities with it and the film didn’t really have that much emotional heft that being said I still had a lot of fun with it I think Payne Reed brings a lot of great ideas when it comes to the concept of shrinking and growing to his films it’s always a blast and I think Payne Reed has done a serviceable job with these films so far I couldn’t really honestly imagine anyone else handling these films with the same tone and the same breeziness that he has yeah Michael Douglas is saying that they start filming January  so that probably means this will be in phase 5 right yeah it’ll be coming out sometime in 2022 as will the spider-man into the spider-verse sequel right yeah I’m really looking forward to that that’s gonna be coming out April 8th directorial team is coming back I kind of would like to see the film be directed by Phil Lord and Chris Miller instead of just produce the movie this time but either way I’ll be super excited because I just absolutely love the first into the spider-verse movie and I’m really excited as to where they will go with it in this sequel like will we get to see Miguel O’Hara play a larger role he’s spider-man 2099 and he played a brief cameo at the end credits scene of the first film right I’d like to see like honestly the entire cast from the first one come back and then go on an even larger adventure I’m actually really surprised that the sequel is coming out that late well they put a lot of work into that film it takes a while to make an animated film of that particular style in calibre also you just want to make sure that they get the script right because the script for the first movie was just amazing yeah it was that make sense there’s not too much more to talk about regarding ant-man or spider-verse considering that these were just announced but just something to look forward to you wanted to share that with you guys cuz I’m definitely excited about it but I think that DISA for all the news for this episode so let’s go ahead and get into our main event where we find out who would win in a fight between the Metal Men and Colossus of the x-men [Music] alright metalman versus colossus i’m not gonna lie we’ve wanted to do a colossus match for a while but i have the hardest time coming up with DC characters whose sole power is just that they’re strong right we’ve come across this issue a few times but I think we’ve done well so far I’m really excited that you chose the metal man I almost completely forgot that the metal men were a thing until you brought them up again I was like oh yeah I freaking love those guys those are hilarious this is a perfect match I think hopefully it’s a perfect match yeah yeah we’ll find out once we run the simulations but I chose the Metal Men because they’re metal and they’re men and what is Colossus but a metal man he’s the literal Man of Steel Superman before we get into the simulations between Metal Men and Colossus if you haven’t listened to one of our episodes before the way we find out the winner is stat based simulations right we take each character statistics which are laid out for Marvel from the official Marvel Power Rankings grid and we extrapolate DC stats from that criteria that they set up and we incorporate a few more statistics just to make a remote robust simulation right such as range and invasiveness and we take those numbers and we run them through what’s called a Monte Carlo simulation which randomizes those figures along a normal distribution which is a bell curve and compares them against each other a thousand times which simulates 1\,000 battles and from those results we get a percentage of wins for each character now no character ever wins 100% of the time which I refill is barely true to the comic books themselves you know Batman has always found a way to be Superman even though statistically Superman would make Batman a smear right and the Monte Carlo simulation accounts for any variable that would allow one character to win over another so we feel it’s a very scientific unbiased mathematical approach to the question of who would win it’s the same approach that the old spike television showed Deadliest Warrior used to take about five ten years ago so we don’t consider fan votes we don’t take into account uncharacteristic feats of strength it’s just all based stats right and before we run these simulations we like to go into the histories and abilities of each character that we’re pitting against each other so I think I go first this time with the character of Colossus so let me go ahead and tell you all about that character now Colossus is the x-men’s resident strong man but like the best x-men characters Colossus goes against type by also being one of the most kind-hearted artistic and pacifist members of the team he may be one of the strongest mutants alive but instead of reveling in that he has always been a man to focus most on the people in his life that he loves including his family as in his immediate family but also his surrogate x-men family Pyotr Nikolayevich Rasputin grew up on his family farm in Siberia Russia formerly the Soviet Union he was the middle child of the family his older brother was a famed Russian cosmonaut named Mikhail and his little sister was named Ileana who would later be known as the mutant magic in fact all of the recipe and children were mutants a seeming coincidence that was in fact manipulated through eugenics and selective breeding by the Soviet government and the x-men villain mr. sinister the Russians groomed Peters older brother to be in their space program in an effort to test and study his mutant potential and Mikhail seemingly died in a space explosion that in actuality sent him to another dimension Pyotr decided he would have to become twice the son and brother for his family after Mikhail’s death and took on a lot of work at the family farm his mutant abilities first manifested as he was working in the fields and saw that a runaway tractor was about to run over his sister he jumped into the path of the machine to shield her yet neither he nor Ileana were harmed he found that his skin had transformed into an organic steel and his indestructible body had saved both their lives the act caught the attention of Professor Charles Xavier who was using cerebro to find a new team of mutants to recruit and rescue the original x-men from the sentient island of krakoa with his family’s blessing Pyotr left the farm and moved to Westchester living at Xavier school for the gifted and given the codename Colossus he found living in the u.s. hard to adapt to a first and would often write letters home to his family but he eventually developed close bonds with storm Wolverine and Nightcrawler during a fight with a villain arkaid whom you can learn more about in our Riddler verse arcade duel episode pewter sister was kidnapped the team rescued Ilyana and he asked Professor X if she could live at the school where he could prep where he could better protect her Professor X agreed and Ilyana became the first non mutant to study at Xavier school though Charles held strong suspicions that she too would one day manifest mutant abilities which she would and become a key member of the new mutants team as magic happy to have some of his family now living with him Peter grew close to his teammate Kitty Pryde the attraction was mutual but both were too shy at the time to act on it after the events of the Dark Phoenix saga which you can learn more about in our Raven vs Phoenix duel Pyotr learned that his parents were killed and his sister was kidnapped by the Soviets in an effort to control illyana’s powers he and the x-men were able to save her however upon Eliana’s return she became the first to be infected with the legacy virus a deadly strain released by the villain strife that was fatal to mutants she died from the disease and Pyotr was devastated in his grief he joined Magneto’s ranks as one of his acolytes eventually he became disillusioned with Magneto’s ways and he joined his teammates Nightcrawler and shadow cat on the European mutant team Excalibur before the team dissolved and the three moved back to the United States beast managed to find a cure for the legacy virus though in order for it to work it needed to be injected into living tissue in a likely fatal process and you can learn more about this in our beast boy vs beast episode in secret Colossus injected the cure in honor of his sister Ileana sacrificing himself for her and for all of mutant kind his body was cremated and Kitty Pryde scattered his ashes over his old Siberian farm however it later turned out that he orders body was stolen and experimented on by aliens from breakworld before it was cremated their experiments resurrected him and he was eventually discovered by the x-men and rescued by Kitty Pryde and the two began a romance relationship during the events of house of M where the Scarlet Witch recreated reality in a fit of madness brought on by the secret manipulations of Doctor Doom Colossus is sister Ileana was brought back from the dead she and Pyotr retains their powers at the end of that arc during M day when the Scarlet Witch removed most of the world’s mutant powers during the Avengers vs. x-men story the Phoenix force returned to Earth for its new host the first child to be born after M day named hope the Avengers deemed the Phoenix a threat while the x-men saw as a means to restore mutants of their powers and a rift between the two teams was formed Iron Man created a weapon that scattered the Phoenix force into five fragments which inhabited five mutants who became known as the Phoenix five Piazza and Ileana were two of these mutants so uh puter eventually saw how they were becoming corrupted by their new power and the siblings fought and knocked each other out releasing the Phoenix power from them in the end hope acquired the Phoenix force and used it to restore the powers of former mutants on earth during this time pewter also wielded the crimson bands of cyttorak and therefore had the juggernauts powers which he used to stop Cain Marko who had abandoned site auric and served the serpent aka cult the Asgardian god of fear the crimson bands began influencing destructive tendencies in Pyotr however in ileana was able to free him of the demon entity’s curse by teleporting her brother to limbo and removing the bonds he returned to Siberia to work peacefully as a farmer and a painter before being convinced by a sister to return and help mutant kind in their fight for survival during the time the Terrigen mists had been released into the atmosphere by the inhuman King Black Bolt they were causing mutants to fall ill and died after pyotr joined the fight against the Inhumans their queen Medusa destroyed the Terrigen cloud ending the skirmish Kitty Pryde a later proposed to Pyotr but eventually backed out believing that despite the fact that they loved each other their past didn’t leave a good foundation for a lifelong marriage what and that’s his history dang cold blooded powers why is Colossus can convert the tissues of his body into organic steel metal as strong and durable as osmium steel everything including his internal organs and eyeballs become incredibly dense and durable the transformation grants him super-strength making him able to lift 100 tons and grants him peak human speed where he’s able to run 35 miles per hour he utilizes judo and wrestling techniques when fighting can’t a hand and has received some martial arts training from Wolverine and that’s all of his powers Colossus is a cool character here’s an interesting backstory yeah yeah usually in these duel episodes we find similarities and the characters backstories that like we had no idea existed yeah that’s not gonna happen I think you’re gonna say that there are a lot of similar well yeah I’m interested in learning about the metalman they’re kind of one of the more obscure DC characters that we’ve done yeah for sure although I would say they’re fairly well-known to most DC Comics fans yeah yeah this should be the story of the metal man actually goes back thousands of years when Atlantis sank beneath the sea waters and took their knowledge of magic and the arcane with them soon after Atlantis sank a group of wannabe alchemists formed a group known as the acolytes of MU who sought to find the quote-unquote soul of matter known as the quintessence because they believed that if they could find the elements soul they could control the element one of the alkaloids was named Simon Magnus who discovered the ancient Atlantean mode of communicating with matter while studying Atlantean Scrolls and he forged an artifact known as the wheel of the world which allowed him to transform and control elements he made the mistake of showing his creation to the other acolytes who immediately tried to kill him for the wheel realizing that whoever controlled the wheel could rule the world Simon hit a before he was killed and the wheel was lost in time ages past and Simon’s descendant in the current century doctor will Magnus was a scientific prodigy and inventor who studied under dr. Thomas Oskar Morrow who would later become the scientific supervillain genius T omorrow or tomorrow dumb wills work made him very wealthy early in life and his discoveries led to the foundation of the scientific field of element’ --ax an amalgam of chemistry and robotic science that worked toward the creation of artificial life call it genetic memory or destiny will unknowingly recreated a version of the wheel of the world as a small micro computer called a response ometer which he placed in a robot made of platinum which he was able to afford Wow the intelligence that the Platinum robot exhibited was far beyond what we’ll expected however as the robot nicknamed Tina thought and behaved like a human woman even going so far as to confess her love for will weird though will rebuffed her advances he did at her request and out of his own curiosity make more like her oh thank god she’s will made new robots made of gold mercury iron lead and tin I guess that was all he was able to afford by that point each of whom who also unexpectedly emerged with their own personalities once he fitted them with a response ometer gold was noble and smarts platinum was passionate mercury was snarky iron was brave lead was dim-witted or dense get it yeah and tin was insecure but friendly wil realized that the response emitters brought out the innate soul of the matter itself and the robots were exhibiting the character of the elements they were made of under the direction of will and the leadership of gold the metal men fought other robots and monsters spawned from weird science including the missile men the gas gang and the plastic perils well they’re just love alliteration though their arch nemesis was a giant chemical monster known as chemo the metal men were destroyed in almost every adventure and battle they went into but their willingness to sacrifice themselves to protect innocents inspired will to repeatedly rebuild them after recovering their response ometer x’ huh other metal men were crated throughout the years including platinum man who went rogue and joined the missile men there was copper a sarcastic sister robot for the others who was created later in the team’s career and whom we’ll often forgot to rebuild whatever the team was destroyed that’s what stuff and there was nameless another tin creation created by tin who wanted a girlfriend nameless was thought to have been destroyed when she asked will to recreate her into something beautiful and her response ometer burned out in the process but it turned out platinum man salvaged her and kept her as his prisoner for years with the help of Batman the Metal Men rescued a nameless and she Anton were married though nameless was destroyed in an explosion immediately after the ceremony in an effort to protect her husband and France from the missile men that said yeah Tim can never catch a break ah so the Metal Men fought alongside other DC heroes to stop the omec cyborg invasion during the Infinite Crisis storyline they were destroyed of course and will was captured by the country of carnea where he was tortured and brainwashed he was eventually rescued by the US military for whom he began working but carnea was able to use wills research to create plutonium man a radioactive metal man who was eventually defeated by the recreated metal man once again at the cost of their own lives due to the torture and mental stress he endured will had a psychological breakdown was diagnosed as bipolar and it was no longer able to remember how to get the response ah meters to work as he recovered will often visited his former mentor and friend T omorrow who was in prison and who clued him onto a conspiracy involving the disappearance of mad scientists Morrow went missing soon after though he left for will the missing code to get his response ometer ‘he’s working again before he could use the code however wil was also captured and taken to a Long Island where inter-gang was forcing scientists to create weapons them during his imprisonment will scrounge small bits of metal to create a miniature one-inch metal man that helped him escape that’s cool later wills evil brother David used a device stolen from T omorrow to transform the metal man into the death metal band love this made up of uranium strontium thorium radium polonium and fermium and they were a band we’ll was able to reverse the process however and defeat his brother and the new 52 will started off as a government contractor tasked with creating artificially intelligent search and rescue robots that could withstand hazardous or toxic environments we’ll created the response ometer and the Metal Men though when he learned the government was going to use them as assassins the Metal Men fled and hid in his apartment in the chaos someone stole one of his response summoners and dropped it into a vat of toxic waste which created the new version of chemo the metal men sacrificed themselves to destroy chemo again before they were brought back to help cyborg take on the artificially intelligent system known as grid now powers wise each of the metal men have full control over the atoms that make up their bodies thanks to their response summoners which again basically brings consciousness to the element it’s in they can stretch and shape their bodies though someone like mercury finds this much easier to do than lead they’re also extremely durable and strong though there’s a spectrum there as well iron is much stronger than tin in the rebirth era of DC some of the better electrical conductors like iron have been able to incorporate other tech into their bodies allowing them to form energy cannons and the like now for this match I won’t be using any integrated tech and I won’t be using all of the metal man because I don’t think that’s a fair match okay I’m going to send in iron to represent the metal man against Colossus because like Colossus he’s sort of the group’s resident strongman is lead not the resident strongman he’s like the big brute guy right so lead is good when he’s defending them against like radioactive attacks stuff like that yeah he’s a good defense man but like when it comes to like the strength of metals there’s really four factors you have to take into consideration and I forget the names of each but it’s essentially like squeeze ability stretch ability like scratch ability and like shatter ability okay so lead is actually really easy to scratch it’s nowhere near as strong as iron in a lot of those factors okay but iron is still malleable right as a character yeah iron can shape-shift cool what about gold gold is the team leader right yeah but gold as a metal is actually pretty weak okay yeah closest would just stamp him into the ground anyway I don’t know about that all right so you’re sending out iron as the representative of the metal man team so it’s gonna be iron versus Colossus which is it as good of an episode title as Metal Men so before we run the Monte Carlo simulations on these character stats what we’d like to do is improvise and speculate on a scenario in which the characters actually fight now we don’t set a ton of rules for this matchup we do say that the characters start about  anything about each other say for that the other one is a threat that needs to be put down and they fight in an environment that plays no factor in the battle itself right because we don’t take stats for the environment the characters have to win on their own merits so let’s go ahead and get into it iron versus Colossus they start out 50 yards apart from each other who goes first well Colossus is kind of like a pacifist he’s kind of like a peaceful character so I don’t think he’s gonna charge headstrong into this battle iron absolutely will yeah he is the headstrong let’s go into battle member of the Metal Men okay so iron starts off by transforming his fists into like giant sledgehammers and he turns his legs into a coiled spring which uses to bounce toward Colossus hammers first okay now that’s pretty good alright so iron swings these hammers and Colossus raises up his fist in defense and gets smashed come on it’s not gonna hurt him that bad his skin is made of osmium steel right he uses his palms and he presses against the hammerheads and he pushes them apart and out from him and he headbutts iron right in the face and leaves a big old dent in his skull okay so that because his iron to like shift back into his like normal robotic form and he has like this colossus shaped dent in his face so then he just like sticks his thumb in his mouth and then like blows really hard and his face pops back to normal okay so iron is just as indestructible as colossus is but in a different manner right well this will be interesting and once he’s reformed that’s when he like grapples Colossus and transforms into like this giant hydraulic press they just like search rushing Colossus down it’s looking well for a hydraulic press to be most effective you need to focus a lot of psi on one particular area I don’t think you would have enough force to crush all of classes his body but he may be trying to crush like I don’t know Colossus his hand or something like that his head his head yeah okay so Colossus is like feeling the pressure against his head from this hydraulic press and what he does is he reaches up and he breaks the press with his strength and he reaches out and grabs iron and kind of like constricts him crushes him into like the square cube kind of like how they do at the car junkyards okay and then he dropped kicks and punts iron right up into the stratosphere okay does he punch him like straight up above him no I mean like it’s you know it’s like in an arc kind of thing okay well that’s when iron transforms into like an airfoil okay so then he just starts gliding towards Colossus and right when he’s over Colossus he turns into like a giant anvil and just like drops straight down on what is he Kirby from a smash brother yes yes okay so the anvil lands on Colossus his head it’s probably a big handy anvil that kind of probably smashes Colossus into the ground like a hammer to a nail exactly all right so Colossus his legs are probably stuck in the ground and his head is like really concussed and it days he grabs the anvil and starts slamming it into the ground caiman like these small tremors that break the ground up and free him from the ground so get out okay well there’s no way iron is just gonna let him do it as Colossus is smashing iron into the ground that’s when iron transforms until like these huge armored restraints and just like baiance Colossus his hands together okay so Colossus his hands are bound but he just like slams these restraints on his knee you know and so he’s just like slowly but surely cracking into the iron restraints until the restraints just break right in half on his knee and then with his hands-free he starts punching his own fists together which in essence is making iron punch himself in a way okay iron is pretty dazed by that so right when Colossus is about to like slam his fists together again iron just kind of like tumbles off of his hands causing Colossus to slam his own fists together now this really hurts but it also creates a shockwave that sends them both flying apart from each other yeah I imagine it would sound like a loud Clank now at this point irons gonna turn into a drill and I think I did the same exact thing with Metamorpho but he’s gonna turn into a drill and then go into the ground and now he’s just like drilling towards Colossus all right well Colossus doesn’t know what to do he runs over to the hole where iron went into any piques his head over the hole big mistake my friend why I don’t know yet because while he was in the hole iron turned into like a piston which just like fired right up at Colossus and face knocking go onto his back No Colossus saw it coming because he you know peeked over the hole wearily and as the piston shot up Colossus quickly grabbed it yanked it out of the ground and does like a backward body slam wrestling move and just slams iron into the ground with not only the force of his strength but also the force in which iron shot up out of the hole interesting move yeah and then Colossus just drops into him elbow first like shattering the piston and exposing irons response helmet err oh shit Colossus sees this like little microchip it’s not that little of a microchip oh really it could fit in your hand okay well he sees this thing that doesn’t look like the rest of the things so he’s assuming that hey this must be this robots brain so he reaches for it okay so just to clarify how intact is iron at this point well I mean he has a few pieces missing from him the colossus made a big ol crack into him when he dropped into him with the elbow that has exposed the response time utter but largely he’s still mostly intact I think is how I imagined it okay cuz irons not like mercury like you can’t just like liquify his body and pull it all together you know yeah it takes a little bit more effort than that but if he’s still mostly intact his metal will cover up the response ometer pretty quickly so yeah classes got a peek at it but he’s not getting to that thing yet okay iron seals up the crack to cover up his response ometer before Colossus can get it and he tres warms his hand into a wrecking ball like on a chain and just starts spinning around knocking it to Colossus over and over again and pushing him back away from him that’s a pretty good move well Colossus is getting like pushed back but the wrecking ball keeps spinning right right and so classes just like plays tetherball with the thing he punches the wrecking ball as a swinging at him and he punches the wrecking ball right into irons own body oh jeez and then he presses the attack and charges toward iron okay well iron is back in his robot form and he meets the challenge except as Colossus approaches him his arms are now a jackhammer so Colossus runs right into his jackhammer forearms and irons just pounding into Colossus and he makes Colossus fall over and he’s just pounding him into the ground Colossus is getting pounded into the ground he reaches up breaks the jackhammer pools iron towards him smashes him in the face grabs his a response ometer and crushes it in his hands except Colossus doesn’t know where the response ometer is he could have it in his ass yeah okay alright so basically he spends the whole the rest of the time trying to figure out where this respond Samet er is yeah and iron keeps like shifting it to his body and attacking back that’s probably a good place to end this match before finding out the winner let’s go ahead and run the simulations and find out which of these two characters won this particular scenario [Music] all right this is a fun match I’m glad I went with iron yeah yeah I mean the other metal man they all have different like tricks up their sleeves like I know platinum could get really sharp and Mercury’s like super liquidity is that a word liquidy but I think iron was a good mix between the two you know and he’s super strong so right worked out well now statistics wise these two characters were not quite as close as I thought they would be I mean they’re similar in terms of their like movement speed but when I came to strength we actually found that Colossus was stronger yeah and Colossus was a better fighter and he was more durable but iron has a greater range and evasiveness stat due to his elasticity so they kind of compensated for each other I really think that this is gonna be a close match I have no idea who’s gonna win but we pulled Twitter and Instagram on Twitter 67% of the responders said that Colossus would win and on Instagram 71% of the responders said that Colossus would win so a lot of people are rooting for Colossus as am i that’s who I hope and I think is gonna win this match we’ll have the results right here the winner of this week’s duel is iron no no yes surprisingly why it’s his evasive in range stat he’s just so much higher than those categories then Colossus he’s barely lower the classes and a bunch of categories but he really shined a brighter in range any base of this fuck yeah yeah iron 150 6.2 percent of the 1000 matches Colossus won 438 wow that’s not that close I mean well that’s not as close as I wanted it to be so it’s because he’s a liquid metal basically that he beats Colossus so this is like Terminator versus t1000 essentially yes I didn’t even think about it that way now it makes sense why iron would I guess ya t1000 would normally be t800 this was just a bad matchup then I didn’t even think about the advantages that liquid metal character would have over a solid metal character ruin my fucking day why don’t you ruined your weekend pretty sure eek God class this is still my boy I don’t care what you say I want to go cry yeah I know he has a lot of fans out there and hate to disappoint you guys but this is just better no like just come over to our side I don’t even know su Metal Men is okay we’re at the point now where we’ve gone through every a-list and B list DC character and now we’re just on the nobodies Marvel still has like 20 more a list characters to go through that’s what makes us better people know who Colossus is barely anyone knows who iron in the metal men are just because they’re less popular doesn’t mean they can’t kick your ass alright that does it for this episode of guys go ahead and let us know what you thought about this matchup by reaching out to us on Facebook Twitter or Instagram or you can email us at dynamic duel podcast at gmail.com don’t forget that on social media you can also share your favorite episode of this podcast to become entered into a drawing where we’re giving away the full four-issue miniseries of the DC vs. marvel 90’s event yeah honestly like it hurts to give that away because I want it for myself but it’s like the perfect prize for our show right because it introduces the concept of the DC and Marvel brothers basically these entities that pit the universes against each other so again you have until Thanksgiving this month to win also don’t forget to visit us on dynamic duel comm where you can not only listen to our podcast but you could also find a link to our merchandise store which is on T public and check out some of the t-shirts and phone cases and pins and stickers that we sell there’s a ton of sales going on this month right leading up to the holidays if you haven’t checked us out on t public now would be the time to do it because the new merchandise that we’re adding to the store for this week is the metal man I think it’s just gonna be one of them really maybe gold or platinum I’ll do platinum you don’t draw all of them that’s lame I’m not gonna buy that shit you wouldn’t anyway well we do have a colossus sure I’ll just buy that that works that works don’t forget to share subscribe rate and review our podcast on whatever platform you’re listening to us so if you’re able to please rate us on iTunes again that’s what Rotten Tomatoes is looking for in order for us to become eligible to become critics on that platform right I have it all calculated out there are nine weeks left in this year we have to average a little over three and a half ratings each episode if we want to make it to our goal of 200 before the year’s end it would be a Christmas miracle in our next episode we will be reviewing x2x been united right and we’re doing that because this is the first movie that Colossus made in live-action appearance in although he made his best appearances in the Deadpool films we’ve already reviewed those but I’m a big fan of the X 2 movie and really excited to be reviewing it next week that does it for this episode up up and away true believers

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Start listening to Batman Returns Review
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